Why is it so hard to know how God speaks to me?
I’ve heard that question so often. It breaks my heart because I know the angst it represents.
Can we really know when God is talking to us? Can we really hear and know for sure what God says and wants us to hear? With all my heart, I say, “Yes.” However, we have to understand how to listen to God.
Listening is a communication skill. It’s not automatically acquired just because we have ears and language. Besides, listening to God is a different form of listening. His communication doesn’t come through our ears but through our hearts and minds.
We know how to pray and how to use our words with God. If we want to understand God’s response, we must give Him the courtesy of listening to hear His response.
Prayer is a dialogue, not a monologue. It’s a courtship, not a formula. We listen at a deeper level with more honesty and without imposing our ideas. Thankfully, there are principles to guide us. Consider this a starter list:
The longing to hear God is the first step.
Just wanting to hear Him puts you in the right attitude to listen. God placed this desire in your heart. That longing is your first sign that you can recognize God communicating with you.
God’s voice connects with God’s character.
You distinguish voices by the tenor and rhythm of speech. While God’s voice doesn’t have a sound, it reflects His character. The best way to recognize His communication is to expand your understanding of His character. He is Perfect Love, Absolute Truth, Unfailing Presence, and Unrelenting Kindness. He is All Knowledge no matter what the question or situation is. He wants to use His character to guide us and love us like no one else can. Listen for how He communicates that message before you try to listen for an answer to a specific question.
God communicates the best way you will understand.
Remember, God wants you to hear Him more than you want this. He knows what you will understand and how you will recognize His message. Many reject what God says because it isn’t what they want to hear. Put away all restrictions. Let your heart listen to the message you didn’t expect.
God’s communication always connects with His Word.
He won’t tell you “yes” to something He has already said “No” to in the Bible. One way to start listening to God is to read His Word as if God Himself were saying it personally to you. It is almost redundant when people thumb through the Bible to find something God is speaking to them. The Bible is all His words. Make a connection with His Word. It’s your first way of hearing from God.
God’s voice is gentle and affirming.
Where did we learn that God’s voice was a negative, pushy voice telling us everything we do wrong? I call that voice “the pointy-finger-voice.” It is not God’s way of communicating. It could belong to a parent or teacher or even yourself. It’s the shaming voice. But God doesn’t shame us into doing the right thing. He loves us too much to do that. He whispers, You can do this because I’m here to help. I believe in you.
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God often communicates what we would never tell ourselves.
As I pray to God, I sometimes explain why I can’t do something God asks of me. Practice has taught me the difference between God’s instructions and my negative self-talk. I used to believe that all the negatives that swirled in my head were evidence of God’s communication. Now, I know that’s my self-deprecating voice. I have to silence my self-talk (usually negative) to hear what God is saying. Then, what comes are encouraging words I would never tell myself. You can do this. I will help you. Let me show you how.
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Obedience and God’s Word will confirm God’s voice.
How will you know for sure that it is God talking? When you obey whatever He tells you to do as confirmed in the first four principles. Confirmation comes after obedience, not before it. Remember, following God is a faith journey. Practice identifying the loving, gentle whisper and obey the direction as quickly as the situation indicates. God will make sure you see the wisdom of His instruction.
God desires to help us retrieve His image He planted in us. He will always nudge us toward His character. He will always offer ways to grow the fruit of His Spirit. Our goal is following God’s direction. Don’t just schedule a listening time. Open your heart to listen for His whisper all through the day. Then, God’s promise to be with you always will become as real as your own breath. Then, you will want to keep listening.
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